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Submitted on
October 14, 2007
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Why aren't there more one-eyed christian photographers?

This is a serious question, even though at first it seems ridiculous. According to christians, jesus was or spoke on behalf of a supreme, all-powerful, all-knowing, being - a supreme being that definitely has some strong ideas about appropriate or inappropriate behavior. And, in one of jesus' sermons, he supposedly said:

(Matthew 5:28) But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.
(Matthew 5:29) And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.

That sounds pretty clear to me. It sounds to me like if you're:
a) a photographer
b) christian
c) married
and you get a little bit sweaty or maybe you think "whoh. look at her butt!" while you're gazing through the viewfinder - the supreme all-powerful creator of the universe wants you to rip your eyeball out. It's that simple. That little directive, supposedly the words of the all-powerful, is pretty clear and unambiguous. So what's going on? Where are all the one-eyed christian photographers? For that matter, where are all the one-eyed christians who watch late-night cable TV?

The answer seems simple, to me. They believe it's bullsh*t, just like I do, only they don't have the guts to put their eyeball in play. See, because if I actually believed a bunch of ridiculousness like christians claim to, I'd actually do it. I mean, what kind of retard would let a little thing like some pain and your own eyeball get in the way of eternal salvation? Not me!

I got onto this track when I was trying to learn a bit about christian doctrine from some nutters I met who really believe the whole thing and were enlightening me as to why christianity is down on "pornography." I asked them where that came from and they graciously pointed me at those sentences from the sermon on the mount.
"That's it!?" I cried.
"Yep. That's it. Blessed are the words of the lord." they replied.

What a bunch of nonsense!!

Models: The artist (with eyeball) and Stacy. Make-up by Stacy.
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Saint-Tepes Featured By Owner May 14, 2013  Hobbyist Artist
If your right eye causes you to stumble, pluck it
out and throw it away from you. For it is more
profitable for you that one of your members should
perish, than for your whole body to be cast into Gehenna.

If a body part is infected you must remove it if you want to live right? Look at Bob Marley, he had a type of malignant melanoma under the nail of one of his toes and he died because he didn't have an operation to remove it.

So you are retarded to believe the phrase word by word and not in a different way :P
lisa-im-laerm Featured By Owner Sep 21, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
the rules are always for others, they like to forgive themselves more than others, thats why witchburning was so popular ;)
mjranum Featured By Owner Sep 21, 2012
lisa-im-laerm Featured By Owner Sep 22, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
timsumma Featured By Owner Nov 26, 2011
There is a book that will help you sifer the lovely words of the Crist, it is titled "Strange Fruit". What he said is vary well the truth, it is the context that is not correct. Big hint, the man was talking about fly agarei, or in layman terms, red toped magic mushrooms.

It goes along way to explain the secret teachings of Christ. You don't get it, his teachings were never intended for the common or lay people. LOL!!!

Now go and have you some real fun! He would and did!
mjranum Featured By Owner Nov 27, 2011
I doubt very much that the bible was inspired by drugs. I've done plenty of various drugs and none of them have made me as stupid as the nonsense in the bible.
timsumma Featured By Owner Nov 27, 2011
Ok, to each his own. By the way, that first testament, it is Hebrew, as in the Talamude (sp). So who knows?

mjranum Featured By Owner Nov 27, 2011
No, depending on what you're referring to, it's Ahramaic. Or Greek translations of Ahramaic.
timsumma Featured By Owner Nov 27, 2011
Sorry, I'm lost. I have no idea what this message is related to.

BrotherAtticus Featured By Owner May 22, 2011
So, either many Christians are disobedient ("hypocrites" is the improper term here, since Christians do not demand that others literally pluck their own eyes out), or the Bible is taken too literally by its critics. In both cases, this doesn't affect the credibility of the religion itself. It's a shame that in a "free-thinking" culture, Christianity has to endure so much hostility despite the inflexibility of human nature. It seems Huxley wasn't exactly being paranoid when he wrote about that "brave new world"...
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